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There are so many reasons why an office should be organized. For some, the thought of being unable to locate certain documents can be difficult. For others, the idea that they will accidentally step on a pile of spilled thumbtacks can be worse. That is why I am here to discuss everything the average individual (and let's not forget all you above-average as well) will need.


First things first. You'll need a computer. Now, I know some of you older folks are saying that computers are for young people and that you still miss the concept of a party line. But the thing to remember is that no matter your age, you need a computer. Even if it's a really old Apple, you know, from 2019 or so. Just have it prominently displayed on your desk.


Desks

Oh, you don't have a desk? What kind of office is this? If you don't have a desk then you must have a library. In that case, this blog is not for you. But yes, a desk is important. But what kind should you get? Think of the possibilities:

  • Standard rectangle

  • L-Shaped

  • Standing

  • Standing with a treadmill

These are the four main desks. and for those of you considering a U-shaped desk, you're overachieving. It's a home office for god's sake, not the top floor of Kirkland and Ellis.


The toughest desk, of course, is standing with a treadmill. These "walking" desks are meant to give a person the opportunity to exercise while they type, are on calls, or are typing while on calls. People who use these are real jerks. Most people cannot even stay awake during phone calls and these people are knocking out a 5K. If you are one of these people, the rest of us look down on you. Or, actually, up and with disdain.


Calendars

Then there is the question of calendars. Sure, most of you will have a calendar on your computer/phone/mini-fridge (they put interfaces in everything) but it helps to have one on your wall or desktop. The question is placement. Some will put it under their keyboard like a heathen, allowing the letters to smudge and the need to lift everything to look at dates. Others will mount it on the wall where they will look at it constantly, believe they have an appointment, and then realize they prematurely ripped off June.


Regardless of where you place your calendar, make sure it is the most generic one you can find. Don't try and be cute and get the kind with a photo on top of a photoshopped dog doing yoga or some kind of wouldnt-you-like-to-visit-here photos. What you want is a calendar with huge squares that is, at minimum, two feet wide and two feet tall. It should have every holiday listed, including ones you've never heard of that, you tell yourself you'll look up someday.


Implements

Are you a pencil-pusher? What about a pen enthusiast? Maybe you're a highlighter freak or a Sharpie dork. Do you have a favorite pair of scissors that you use for everything? What about an old wooden ruler that has a crack in it? Perhaps you have paper clips. Or are you more of a stick-note person? If so, do you go for the standard yellow or are you a multi-color multipack person?


These are the big questions we all need to ask ourselves as we prepared to set up our home offices. One of the big questions, if you are a pen enthusiast, is point thickness. There are so many choices. For more information I visited Pen Chalet where they discuss everything pen-related. Consider this:

"When selecting a pen you may wonder what is the difference between the inks each pen uses and which pen is right for me. There are so many different types of pens and the inks they use it can be tough deciding how to choose a pen."


Truer words were never spoken. They go on to discuss the benefits of the ballpoint, the roller ball, gel pens, and the classic fountain. If you care more about pens than I do, give them a visit.


Hidden snacks

Every office must have hidden snacks. It is very important for the mind and body to know that there is something sweet nearby to satiate one's tastebuds. It is also important to keep them close enough that family members cannot access them. This is especially true if you have children, animals, or worse, a partner with a snooping issue.


One of the best ways of hiding your snacks is to create a false door behind a photo frame on the wall. However, for those who do not want to start a project, or who may be renting, what about a drawer under the desk? Or a cabinet drawer that locks when you aren't there. You could also go for the false book. Something boring like "The winds at Dawn" or something that sounds like it was written in 1913.


The other question is whether you have access to drinks. Some people go all in and purchase a mini-fridge. Others go halfway in and purchase one of those fridges that looks like a retro cola machine but only holds six cans. This one is stupid and I hate it. Go all in or go to the kitchen. But remember, whichever way you go it is very important that you stock it with a variety of items. This means that not everything can be your favorite soft drink. If it is, you'll gain a lot of weight (unless you're one of the jerks with a treadmill desk) and lose all of your teeth. So make sure to keep water, juice, and at least one glass bottle you thought had a twist top but that requires a bottle opener. You will never open it, but you'll consider it. Also, no alcohol. There's nothing worse than drunk emailing. One group message on Teams about your dog's bowel movement and you'll never do that again.


So there you go, the main issues with setting up a home office. If you have anything to add, I'd love to know about it. Stay remote! Stay strong! Renounce hybrid work!

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